


i should be over all the butterflies (but i'm into you)

by pagmamahal



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Attempt at Humor, Basically Donghyuck doesn't know how relationship works so he cries, Confusion, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Falling In Love, First Love, Fluff, Humor, Light Angst, Love Confessions, M/M, Mark's in a band
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-04
Updated: 2019-08-04
Packaged: 2020-07-31 00:24:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20106109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pagmamahal/pseuds/pagmamahal
Summary: Something about Mark makes Donghyuck just want to cry. He's convinced it's because he's perfect, and he's so ready to risk it all when he sees his picture inside Mark's wallet.But Donghyuck is Donghyuck, and Donghyuck is afraid with the idea of falling in love.(Or, Mark and Donghyuck like each other, but Donghyuck is scared of fucking things up, so Mark assures him that even on their worst nights, he's into him.)





	i should be over all the butterflies (but i'm into you)

**Author's Note:**

> so here's a fucking dump of emotions that i wrote for 4 hours. i am obsessed with markhyuck.
> 
> also, donghyuck is basically just me, so this fic is pretty much self-indulgent because almost everything's based on my real life.
> 
> p.s i tried to be funny but i know it's not gonna work.  
p.s it's happy because i don't like sad markhyuck.
> 
> To ****,
> 
> Sorry for being such a scaredy cat. I like you, still.
> 
> enjoy!

A series of screams brakes out in the cafeteria and Donghyuck cowers with the amount of eyes darting at them. He mentally takes note to scold Chenle later on for being the loudest.

"Chenle, you are so fucking loud." He tries to change the subject, but he knows Jaemin will not let it go anytime soon with that smug look on his face.

"Since when did Mark Lee, I repeat, Mark Lee.." Renjun states with the same bug-wide eyes he has whenever he talks about aliens and shit, ".. known as the school photography club's attractive president AND vocalist of D.REAM started talking to you?"

"And has a huge ass crush on you, may I add." Jaemin continues while drinking his deadly coffee, Donghyuck cringes.

"Look, it's not like I knew this would happen!" Donghyuck gnarles, trying to cover the fact that he's blushing. "If you told one-week-ago-Donghyuck that Mark fucking Lee would come up at him and ask him out someday, he'd burst out his lungs laughing."

"What did you say then?" Jaemin cuts him off. He can still hear Chenle's loud coherent screams and asking _'For real?'_ to himself and laughing after.

"Don't tell me you rejected him." Chenle finally stops screaming and says something decent while drinking his apple juice. Renjun rolled his eyes, "He has been crushing on Mark for a year, don't be stupid."

Donghyuck stares at his untouched fried chicken that was supposed to be gone by now, but instead he can feel bile in his throat, butterflies, ocean waves, and everything that's not fried chicken in his stomach. He lets out an exhausted sigh.

You see, he's not dumb to reject the offer of a date, but he's not confident either to actually go on a date with his stupid one-year long crush.

_It's all Jeno's fault,_ Donghyuck thinks. He was just having a peaceful and normal day in his Oral Comm. class when Jeno blocked his way and gave him a black wallet.

"That's not mine." He declared, already walking past the boy with eyes that can rival the crescent moon when he smiles. He already had enough socialization with people he doesn't care about because of this class. Jeno, apparently, was not.

"I know, it's Mark's." Jeno smiled as if he didn't just say something that made Donghyuck look at him like he grew multiple heads. "And you're giving it to me because..?"

With all honesty, Donghyuck was sweating, afraid that Jeno must knew something about his secret admiration. He started blaming everyone that would pop in his head that might be the suspect of his secret being spilled. _It's probably Chenle, I knew that boy's mouth has its own brain—_

"Just.. keep it, okay Hyuckie? He'll probably go to you and ask for it. Thanks!" Jeno ran while laughing before he could even say a word.

He blinked, ignoring the way his heart was having a work-out session he wished he could do and how his cheeks were warmer than the summer heat.

Donghyuck and Jeno weren't even close, in fact, that was probably the longest conversation they ever had. He would probably be weirded out how he called him _Hyuckie_ but his mind was too busy staring at the black leather wallet he was holding.

He tried to convince himself that _I, Lee Donghyuck, respects everyone's privacy and will not open this wallet because it might contain personal stuff_ but his hands were faster than his brain, and he mentally screamed at himself for being so curious.

"Mr. Lee, you're not allowed to stay at the classroom when it's break time." His Oral Comm. teacher, Mr. Moon, said before leaving but he could not hear a single thing when his heart was beating so loud while staring at the picture kept inside Mark Lee's wallet.

It was him. A picture of him, Lee Donghyuck, on stage with a microphone, singing, and he did not miss the watermark of Mark's photography logo below. He knew when it was taken, it was from their High School night concert just a few months ago where he was invited to perform.

He thought he lost his voice.

Especially when the door practically flew open and Mark Lee came inside, panting and as red as his t-shirt.

Mark cursed as he saw him with his wallet, eyes as wide as Donghyuck's. The air inside his lungs were knocked out because 1.) Mark looked too good and handsome for wearing a simple plain red shirt. 2.) He was probably mad that his wallet, opened at that, was in the possession of someone he barely talked to. 3.) Why the fuck was his picture in there. 4.) He was coming his way. _Oh fuck. He's coming this way. Shit._

"I—"

"Uhm—"

Both of them started talking at the same time, Mark looked away first and Donghyuck practically heard him curse Jeno out again and again before sighing.

"I guess it's now or never." Mark blushed and shyly adjusted his glasses. Donghyuck felt like fainting.

"I like you, Donghyuck.. uh.. will it be too much if you go out with me?"

Chenle screams again.

"That's the fourth fucking time, Zhong." Hyuck scowls, his hand on his forehead. 

"Can you blame me! You just told me Mark Lee was all shy and blushy when he confessed to you!" 

They are on their way home, Donghyuck telling the whole story of what happened before lunch since Chenle's being all pouty.

He is still convinced that he's dreaming, that he'll probably wake up any minute now so he's not getting his hopes up, but something inside him told him that _It's all real, Donghyuck. Mark likes you. Mark likes you. Mark likes you._

He covers his ears and curses out loud until the voice (That, may Donghyuck add, sounds a lot like Jaemin.) that's chanting in his brain stops.

"Aren't you supposed to be happy?" The younger wonders.

Donghyuck stops walking, so does Chenle. He squishes his own cheeks before sitting on the sidewalk, frustrated. His companion does the same, hoping that no one from school sees them as two losers sitting on a dirty sidewalk talking about his confused gay feelings at 5 PM.

"Of course I am, I really am. I was blushing the whole day. I like Mark, and he likes me, we'll go on a date tomorrow. He said it'll be his treat. Everything feels so good.. but as I try to process it, I feel like.. like.."

"Farting?"

"No, you dumbass." He flicks Chenle's forehead which results to another minute of him complaining with his high-pitched voice, and Donghyuck just wants a comet to hit him right there. 

"Then what!" Chenle pouts, rubbing the spot on his forehead. 

"I feel like.. everything's too much. Maybe I'm just overwhelmed." He stares as cars drive pass them, the sun starting to set which reminds him of his duty to cook dinner at home tonight. 

He feels like he's on the stage again, with a microphone, a crowd waiting for him to sing, and honestly, Donghyuck wants everything but that right now.

"Whatever. Let's go home. I need to cook dinner."

Maybe Chenle was right. Donghyuck, inside his Science class with Mark seating beside him casually taking his hand and intertwining his fingers with his, feels like farting.

"Donghyuck."

"A-Ah?" His voice is inaudible, his palms are sweating, and he can't even look at Mark without the sudden urge of locking himself inside a cubicle and cry because _he's so handsome, what the fuck._

Mark chuckles, playing with Donghyuck's fingers and circling his thumb over it. "Don't be so nervous."

Donghyuck lets out an exhale, nodding. "S-Sorry, it's just.."

"Not used to it?"

"Yeah. It's just.. new and foreign so.." He laughs awkwardly. ".. sorry.."

It doesn't help that Donghyuck has zero to none experience when it comes to dating. Sure, he had his crushes and flirted with some of them online, but it's so different when it's real life flirting. Donghyuck feels like his heart is going to stop pumping anytime soon and that his hands are colder than Jaemin's favorite iced coffee and his lips are paler than Renjun when he apparently saw a ghost when they had a sleepover.

And it also doesn't help that Mark has three exes and is probably a thousand more experienced than he is. He stops breathing. _Oh my God, he has three exes. I don't even have a first kiss._

"What's your favorite ice cream flavor?" He hears Mark's attempt at making small talk. He's so ready to just kneel and propose because Mark is so gentle and he probably knows that he likes a loser who gets nervous about hand-holding so he's taking it slow.

"M-Mango." He clears his throat and curses because who the fuck stutters at saying mango.

"Mine's coffee." 

Donghyuck made a face. "You're like Jaemin." He jokes, Mark chuckles and adjusts his glasses. "Is Jaemin your friend?"

"With blonde hair and a body that functions with coffee as gasoline? Yeah, he is."

They continue to talk, bodies in class but minds definitely somewhere else. Donghyuck feels his hands stop shaking and begins to be his casual self. He mentally taps himself on the back, as if congratulating himself and convincing that _it wasn't that bad! You were just overwhelmed, now you managed to overcome it._

That was a lie, and Donghyuck is in the cubicle again, burying his face with his palms.

He doesn't know what he's so afraid of, but he's sure that his overwhelmed state will not go away anytime soon. 

_Am I scared of fucking things up?_

Mark is sweet, gentle, and all nice things combined. He's down to earth, chill, has the cutest laugh Donghyuck has ever heard, passionate, gets high grades, and a famous vocalist of a band called D.REAM. To top all of that, he's handsome. A goddamn heartthrob.

That's why he's been crushing on him for a year now, he's basically the man who steals everyone's hearts. Donghyuck just managed to be the one stealing his.

And he doesn't know how he did, but he knows he's scared shitless.

Now he's hiding inside their university's comfort room, skipping his last class, contemplating his life decisions, and trying to calm down at the fact that he's going out with Mark in less than 40 minutes.

"Donghyuck, I know you're in there."

Renjun's voice fills the room and he feels like crying. He opens the cubicle door, staring at the floor, ashamed.

"Are you okay?"

And Donghyuck just breaks down and tells him everything.

"I don't know.. it's like I'm scared he'd judge me but I know he wouldn't since he's so kind but still—"

"You're just not ready." Renjun strokes his hair comfortingly as he sob. Wiping his snot with his handkerchief, Renjun makes a comment of him being disgusting but laughs it off after.

"How can you tell?" He questions out loud.

"I just think. I mean you never dated anyone, Hyuck. All your life, you just studied and talked to the same set of people. Of course you'll be scared, that someone new is entering your life so fast."

He nods, still sobbing with his chin resting comfortably on Renjun's shoulder. The other boy looks at him in the eyes and gives him a reassuring smile. "Or you doubt yourself so much. You think he's out of your league?"

Donghyuck stays quiet.

"Talk to him about it, hm? I'm sure he'll understand."

Donghyuck feels like fainting again.

He sees Mark waiting for him at the school gate, and Donghyuck keeps walking back and forth. His friends already gave their words of encouragement about 5 minutes ago before disappearing. He hopes for the ground to just swallow him whole, or anything that will temporarily make him vanish. He looks up at the sky, _maybe the comet can hit me now? Please?_

"Donghyuck!" He hears and he swears he almost tripped. The voice belongs to Mark, of course it's Mark. Of course, there's no comet hitting him any time soon, of course the universe wants him to just question his bane existence.

"H-Hi." He whispers, looking anywhere but Mark's face.

"You look pretty."

Donghyuck's face turns redder than Rudolf's fucking nose and Santa's big ass costume. He decides he hates Christmas. He already visions himself burning his Mariah Carey Christmas Special album when he comes home. 

"Wh-What—"

Mark smiles at him widely, (_He is God's favorite son. I just know. I hate Christmas, I'm never celebrating it again,_ Donghyuck screams at the back of his mind.) and repeats himself. "You look pretty with that eyeliner on."

Donghyuck shivers as if it's December but his cheeks remain warm, and he feels his tongue being tied by he doesn't know who but_ I bet it's Jesus' angels or something because I said I hate Christmas. Fuck you, angels._

"Tha.. Thanks.. it's.. Maybelline."

Mark blinks before laughing out loud. He mutters a small, "You're funny." before laughing again. 

Donghyuck waits for the comet.

"Ah, so you don't like coffee?" Mark takes a sip of his large cup, and Donghyuck does his best of trying not to stutter. 

"I drink it but it's not... my cup of tea." He blinks at the unintended pun and slaps himself. "Sorry, I didn't mean to like.. joke.."

"It's okay." Mark chuckles and brings down his coffee. Donghyuck stares at him and tries to breathe normally.

Mark's wearing a simple white shirt, paired with black ripped jeans and black old school converse with his glasses, although it's simple, Donghyuck wants to make stupid decisions like marry him inside Starbucks.

He mentally scowls, because he's Donghyuck and his life is full of stupid decisions anyway.

"Marry who now?" Mark smirks, sipping his coffee and stares at his soul, clearly amused.

_Why am I even fucking alive._

"Please don't tell me I just said that out loud." He closes his eyes to forget the visual of Mark being smug and amused while he embarass himself in front of him.

"Said what? That you want to marry me inside Starbucks?"

It's not like it's not true. Of course he wants to marry Mark, I mean who the fuck doesn't.

But he's stupid and said that impulsively since he can't even try to hold hands with him without wanting to cry and hug his mother.

"I.. haha.. sorry." 

The other frowns, worry evident on his face. "Why are you apologizing?"

Mark holds his hand reassuringly, and Donghyuck feels like his hand's being burned, his whole body's on fire, and that his heart has fireworks all over.

Part of him just wants to say, "Ah no, instinct." but he also wants to risk it all and just say, _Sorry for being such a loser, sorry that I'm scared of relationships because I have no idea what to do when you fall in love, sorry that I get so shy with just simply talking to you because I'm nervous you might not like me and now I'm crying— wait—_

Mark practically drops his coffee on the table and cups Donghyuck's cheeks with his hands, appalled to see his date suddenly crying. "Hey, is something wrong?" He wipes his tears with his thumb, Donghyuck's bottom lip quivers.

"S-Sorry because I'm scared."

It's been two months since the Starbucks incident.

Donghyuck asked for some time, saying that he was too overwhelmed with everything happening too fast, which is partly true. He didn't bother mentioning that he's unexperienced and nervous, or that Mark's face makes him want to cry so he needed some time to get used of his face being so close.

Mark just nodded and told him it was fine and they should stay as friends first. Getting to know each other was important anyway before jumping in to dating, and with that, Donghyuck was convinced Mark was too good to be true and he just ended up crying more.

"How's things with Donghyuck?" Jisung, D.REAM's drummer and Mark's neighborhood friend, asks as he tosses a can of Coke to the said vocalist. Yukhei's busy on the couch tuning his guitar, while Jeno's fixing the strap of his bass.

"All good." His lips curves on their own with the mention of Donghyuck, Yukhei calling him a lovesick fool. He flips him off and opens his can.

"All good? Like you're dating now?" Jeno asks, not looking up. 

"Well, not yet—"

Yukhei stands up and strums the electric guitar, Jeno screaming _'Yukhei! The speaker's right in front of me!'_ with his hands covering his ears before laughing. "Not yet? When do you plan on asking?"

"I'm not going to overwhelm him again." He sighs, staring at his can of Coke. "Besides, we're taking it slow."

"How slow are we talking?"

"Apparently two months."

Mark says his fuck you's to each of them before lying down on their band's basement's couch. 

"He's cute." Jeno adds.

"I know." Mark says dreamily, tossing his phone up and catching it multiple times. Jisung looks at him with horror and anxiety.

"How cute are we talking?"

"Apparently cute enough for Mark Lee to wait for two months."

He glares at them and grabs the nearest thing he can grab, which is Yukhei's guitar capo, and throws it to Jeno who just laughs maniacally.

"What! You dumped Herin when she made you wait for a week, Mark. A fucking week."

Jisung twirls his drumsticks around his fingers. "That's true."

Mark blushes, Yukhei coos, followed by his two other bandmates. 

"Assholes." He opens his phone and scrolls down Twitter, trying to clog his ears with his bandmates' endless teasing.

He stops scrolling to see Donghyuck's tweet just 2 minutes ago, a link of Paramore's Still Into You on Spotify with a caption, "forever my favorite.. might cry if someone sings me this".

"Jeno, do you know the chords of Still Into You?"

"I'm trying to pass this exam, Jaemin."

"And I'm trying to get you a love life. Now, stand up." Jaemin pulls Donghyuck's arms and groans, the sunkissed boy still utterly confused.

It's so weird. Jaemin never skips lunch to take him somewhere, especially that they have an upcoming exam the next damn period. What's weirder is that everyone he walks past through the corridor is staring at him, as if he's the new talk of their school newspaper.

Maybe he's just sleep-deprived. He makes sure to take a sip of Jaemin's deadly coffee later.

Jaemin finally stops dragging Donghyuck and stops in front of a huge door which he recognizes almost easily.

"Isn't this the auditoriu—"

His mouth shuts when he hears someone strum the guitar, and his heart almost jumps right there and there when he hears a familiar voice singing. His mind only gets clearer when he stares at the stage, D.REAM performing his all-time favorite Paramore song.

Mark is singing his favorite song.

Donghyuck, as courtesy of Chenle, feels like farting.

"I should be over all the butterflies, but I'm into you." Mark smiles at him, and Donghyuck feels like burning again, but he wants to do nothing but repeat the fire inside him. 

He slowly walks in front of the stage, his mouth agape. "And baby, even on our worst nights, I'm into you."

His brain just screams bold and capitalized **"FUCK"**s all throughout the song.

But his heart is the one dominating, beating so loud that he think it's already part of the song. However, it's synchronized, as if Mark's voice fits perfectly with his heartbeat.

When the song comes to an end, the lights turns off, and he screams. He blinks again for what felt like years, then suddenly Mark is in front of him with the most pure smile he ever saw and _fuck_, his hands are still clammy and his voice still wants to stutter but something inside Donghyuck says, _It's okay. It's real. Mark likes you._

It still sounds like Jaemin that he can cry.

"Hi."

Donghyuck smiles while tearing up. "I-Is it now or never?" 

Mark chuckles.

"Will you go out with me?"

Donghyuck nods, and he swears he hears Chenle scream again.

**Author's Note:**

> follow my [twitter!](https://twitter.com/kwonT__T)
> 
> love u. ♥


End file.
